Undesirable

I wanted to roll down the window of the car. I wanted fresh air on  my face. But my hands did not move, and my face looked angry. I could sense it.

I was angry at my brother who did nothing actually, he just irritated me. I was angry at my father for calling our driver dumb. I was angry at the loud, roaring sound that a passing motorcycle produced. I was angry at the continued whining of my step-sister. I was angry at the pain in my ass for the trip home, which today seemed like years. I was angry at the dogs for barking so loud.

I was angry because we had to go home early. I did not get to finish the movie I was watching with my crush. Well, if that's not embarrassing enough. I hate myself (looks down with remorse).


I entered the well-lit receiving area of our home and looked at the mirror, I forced my face to look normal. (I'm good at supressing emotions on my face). I went to my room and opened my laptop and wrote this. I wanted to let this undesirable feeling, being angry with things and people, out. I said to myself, "This is one of my mood swings. I was okay 30 minutes ago."

But see, sometimes, a good dinner and good news would make you feel better.